I Don't Have Mother's Intuition
Number 4 has had a cough for a little over a week now and I haven’t thought much of it. I have been treating the symptoms and just waiting for it to run its course. Then the other night I was discussing the day with my wife when I brought up his cough and what we have been doing to give him some relief and I went into my health plan with her. At that point she asked if I could call the doctor and make sure there wasn’t something else that could be done for him. After years of experience and knowledge of the outcome, I quickly said “that is a great idea.” You see my wife has the edge on me as a parent in this area and I am not afraid to admit it.
It is well documented here and in our book Zag Zig Parenting, that I have been a long time stay at home dad. I started when Number 1 was 18 months old and she is about to turn 23. You can do the math, but it has been a long time. I have handled just about everything you can think of; daily clothes battles with what is appropriate for school or what just doesn’t match, drama about what happened with friends at school to who to include in their birthday invitations or discussions with the proper way to treat their car daily to handling the emotions that come along with their first speeding ticket or accident. I think you get the picture! By the nature of my job, I have been on the front line of dealing with most of our kids problems, questions or concerns over the years and I have embraced my role and the importance it has played in the family dynamic.
There is however one area that has never been a strong suit for me and have been very happy(well…)to turn over the reigns to my wife on this one. I am sure you have all heard of Mother’s Intuition and I am here to tell you that it is real and it should not be taken lightly! It has come up many times in our family’s history and I will admit that I haven’t always believed in it’s importance and have thought I knew was to needed to be done since I was the stay at home dad.
I could talk about numerous examples when Mother’s Intuition has positively influenced our kids’ lives, but I think it is safe to say there are few topics that haven’t been affected by my wife and her M.I.. I guess I have to admit I am not wired the same as she is and there is no such thing as Dad’s Intuition. For the longest time, I thought I was as connected on an deep level as she was but I am not. Luckily, I have other skills as a dad that help to compliment Kori’s skills as a mom. I think that is what has made us such a good team.
My advice to other dads out there…when you wife says she has a feeling about something regarding one of your kids, take her seriously and don’t roll your eyes at her like I used to do. I want you to succeed as a dad and a husband and avoid those pitfalls that have derailed me over the years. To those moms out there, sorry for your husband that doesn’t understand that Mother’s Intuition is a thing. Just please understand that your husband brings a lot to the table too, just maybe not as deep of a connection that you do, because, well, you carried your kids for nine months before they were born. You got a big head start. LOL.